Book review: Emotional intelligence 2.0

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The book emotional intelligence is written by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves. It is really an outstanding and productive book for those who cannot manage themselves and their relations. The authors try to make the readers understand about different situations and also handling them by giving tips. The main things which the authors focus on are: personal competence (self-awareness and self-management) and social competence (social-awareness and relationship-management). The first step is self awareness. One should always try to know what does he lack and Why do people not prefer him? To maximize self awareness in someone, the authors introduced some strategies. Some of them are: quit treating your feelings as bad or good, know who and what pushes your buttons, stop and ask yourself why you do the things, spot your emotions in books, movies and music or so on. Indeed, knowing oneself is very hard but not impossible. One should be like a hawk in observing himself, as the hawk can see everything happening on the earth. If someone observes him from all angles then he within no time can improve self awareness. Moreover, the authors add that one must have patience and give himself credit even for the little    thing done good. If he finds new things in him which he had never found, it means he is in progress. Second step is self management which is to be more focused as compared to self awareness. In this step, one has to do things learnt from self awareness and learn to control himself. Some strategies for slef management are as below: breathe right, smile and laugh more, talk to a skilled self-manager, visualize yourself succeeding, focus your attentions on your freedom rather than your limitations, stay synchronized and accept that change is just around. These strategies will help someone to be self managed. The author rightly pointed out that one must sit with someone who is familiar with his thoughts and problems. Because when you sit with a person who knows you well then he can be able to make you understand and show you the right thing in you which you cannot see. I myself have done this and have been benefited.The third step is social awareness. In this phase, one must be able to understand the people he meets. And one must be ready for obstacles coming towards him. One should not think that I will be always happy. No, not at all. This concept is totally wrong. One must be prepared for everything either good or bad. The authors say that in social awareness you must not speak much. Because when you are speaking more and more and not allowing the second one to speak so you will not be able to get him properly. Always have patience and wait for your turn. This thing can help you build up social awareness. Some strategies for social awareness are as like: greet people be name, go people watching, seek the whole picture, step into their shoes and clear away clutter. The last step is relationship management. In this step one must be able to manage relations between him and others. Doubtlessly, managing and going for lifelong relation is not possible but one must not give up. He always should try to keep relations firm. To have good relations with others, one must completely know others as What hurts or makes them happy. For this, some strategies to be followed are: be open and curious, build trust, when you care then show it, acknowledge other’s feelings and do not avoid the inevitable. We most of the times forget using thanks and sorry which indirectly affect our relation. One must use these words when needed. We must not be selfish if we want good relationship. I suggest those _who are emotionally weak and cannot handle situations_ to read this book. This will help them a lot to have good relationships and feel others feeling as well.